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Quillquest
Revise by Subtraction: Cut One Line in Five

Revise by Subtraction: Cut One Line in Five

A revision exercise with a number attached. Delete twenty per cent of the words, count them, and do not replace anything. Most drafts become clearer at minus twenty and unreadable at minus forty, which tells you where your padding lives.

Form
Exercise
Lines
10
Metre
cut exactly twenty per cent of the words, by count, with no rewriting
Date

Worked example: ten lines after cutting twenty per cent, nothing added back

The letter came on a Thursday, and I read it standing up. It said the building was sold and the lease would not renew. I put it on the table, under the sugar bowl, and I did not tell anyone for eleven days. On the twelfth I threw the sugar out and kept the letter.

Count first, decide second

Count the words in the draft. Not the lines — the words. Write the number at the top of the page. Multiply by 0.2 and round down; that is your quota. A 200-word draft has to lose 40 words and there is no negotiating.

Cutting to a quota rather than to taste is the whole exercise. Deciding line by line whether something is good enough is how a draft keeps everything; deciding that the poem is allowed exactly 160 words forces the choice.

What gets cut, in order

First, adverbs attached to verbs that already contain the meaning: walked slowly, whispered quietly, very, really, quite. Second, adjectives doing no work: small, big, nice, beautiful, sad. Third, filler openings — I think that, it seems to me, there is a kind of. Fourth, the second half of any two-clause line where the first half already made the point.

Do not cut any concrete noun, any number, any proper name, or any physical verb. Those are the four kinds of word that carry information, and a cut that removes one of them is not editing, it is amputation.

The worked example, before and after

The draft version ran to about 100 words and contained, among other things: the letter arrived on a Thursday morning as I was leaving, and I ended up reading it standing up in the hallway, and it informed me that the building had been sold and that the lease would not be renewed this year. Cutting to 80 words removed the hallway, the morning, the ending-phrase this year, and three connective clauses.

What the cut exposed is the real event of the poem, which is not the letter but the twelve-day gap and what happens to the sugar. The padding was not decoration; it was a way of postponing the sugar.

Where to stop

Run the same operation again on the cut version and see what minus forty per cent does. It usually breaks. The point where it breaks is your padding line: above it the poem has room to move, below it the poem loses information. Most writers find their useful band is between minus fifteen and minus twenty-five.

Terms used in this entry
padding废话
Words that occupy space without carrying information, often used to postpone the hard part.
quota cut配额删减
Cutting to a fixed number of words rather than by taste.
filler opening开场白
A phrase such as I think that which delays the sentence without changing it.
concrete noun具体名词
A noun naming something you could point at; never cut these during subtraction.